By Nick Lives

I think the thing I love most about being a nerd is being oblivious to nearly all of the popular music stars of the modern age. That isn't to say that I simply enjoy being oblivious for the sake of not knowing things, but I like it because it keeps my stance on music relatively unaltered by popular media and unaffected by the hype for any albums that may be coming out. Essentially, I am impervious to any prior advertising or gossip about these kinds of things. This makes me happy.

All that being said, let's see what the music industry has in store for us today!

Scotty McCreery:  "The Trouble With Girls"

Judging by the title of this song, I can tell you I am already offended. It seems Scotty decided that writing a song about all the problems he associates with the opposite sex would be a good idea. That's not too gentleman-like, now is it?

 If any of you ladies agree, and would like to complain about someone accusing girls of being trouble, feel free to send them to Scotty himself.

All that first-impression rubbish aside, let's get this show on the road already!

Oh, and since this is a video review, we're gonna try something a little different today. You folks watch the video with me and I'll put my commentary and impressions along with the TIME in which they appear so you can keep track of what I'm going on about. When you see a TIME listed, go ahead and pause the video to read my thoughts about it.

Now let's do this.

0:02 - So we're two seconds into the video, and already we are setting the mood. Here we see two manly silhouettes with big ears walking down a dimly lit hallway. Very nice lighting, but one has to wonder what kind of school lights their hallways so dramatically. I wish our school was lit like this, that way you could look like an action hero any time you came through the doors.

0:15 - Wait, what happened to the other guy who was walking with Scotty? Oh, I get it, this is the symbolic "In Scotty's mind" part of the music video. I'm guessing he's gonna sing now, right?

0:20 - This facial expression is priceless. That is all. Moving on, now.


0:46 - It looks like Scotty thinks himself to be a bit of a ladies man here, judging by that smirk on his face. Unfortunately for him, he's getting shooed away by this particular group of ladies. Maybe you shouldn't come off so sexist, eh Scotty?

0:58 - Here we have Scotty obviously wasting this girl's valuable class time. Sure, she appears to be amused by his antics, but inside we all know she's thinking: "You are aware that we keep very toxic chemical in that funnel, yes?"

1:10 - After this incident, Scotty realized he just wasn't cut out to be a chemist. Not pictured here: The girl getting horribly burned due to Scotty's "mishap."

1:46 - This shot, coupled with the lyrics behind it, seem to indicate that Scotty had something to do with the note that girl just received. If this be the case, one has to wonder why the note had to be passed all the way across the room if his intention was simply to pass it to the girl sitting RIGHT NEXT TO HIM.

2:04 - After passing a presumably flirty note to the blonde girl in his clas, here Scotty shows what a classy guy he is by immediately turning around to flirt with yet another girl sitting next to him. Smooth move, Scotty boy.

2:38 - Here we establish Scotty plays baseball. This may seem trivial, but just wait and watch.

2:42 - Here an entire row of pretty girls cheers for... someone. It can't possibly be Scotty they're cheering for, because last we saw him he failed to catch or even recognize an obvious baseball zooming past him. Perhaps they're cheering for that handsome black boy we saw earlier? It was apparent that he meant business when it comes to baseball, so at least that would be a reasonable reason to cheer.

2:52 - Finally we see Scotty actually doing something other than standing around with a goofy look on his face during his baseball game. To put things into perspective, he's finally doing something productive when THE SUN BEGINS TO SET. Man, what an athlete we have here.

3:02 - Now I'm no sports expert, but since when is baseball played using obvious SOCCER nets? Is Scotty playing soccer now or did they just think this shot looked cool and disregarded the context of it?

3:33 - The video seems to end how it began, with a big-eared silouette walking down a dimly lit school hallway. But what ever happened to the other guy? Was he Scotty's twin brother whom he switches places with every other shot or was he some friend of Scotty's that he deemed unimportant due to him having a Y chromosome? Whatever the case, we're missing someone here.

FINAL IMPRESSION: This felt like yet another country music video about a guy who likes girls and about girls with gigantic smiles. What more can I expect? I suppose it accomplishes what it sets out to do: offending its core female audience.

For that, it gets 5 baseballs at a soccer field out of 5.

By Nicholas Lives

So once again a new album lands on my lap waiting for review. Even though I have literally no background in music, I still believe it's rather fitting I review it, in order to give these musicians a more laid back outside perspective. But if you've read any of my other album reviews, you already know this.

So anyway, "Kids in the Street" is apparently a new album from the so-called All-American REJECTS, the band that gave us that song everyone loved in Middle School, "Dirty Little Secret."

(Exasperated Sigh)

Alright, let's get this over with.

...So after having injected my computer with the contents of this two-song sampler CD, I have noticed something a bit odd: The two sample songs don't have song titles.

Given this lack of information, coupled with the fact that I can't be bothered to go searching for titles on the internet, I will be supplying my own titles to each song for your convenience.

NOTE: If you want to hear the song yourself, click on the title.

Track 1: "Teen Angst Nightmare"

Apparently it's customary these days to open your songs with the audible SKREEEEECH of a speaker giving feedback. Considering I'm listening to this on a pair of earbuds,this horrid sound had no where to go but directly into my ear canals. This is quite a painful first impression.

As the after-effect of the SKREECH wears off on my ears, I am now starting to hear some actual music and lyrics. Unfortunately, it's not much better.

From what I can understand by the angst-driven man's lyrics, this is yet another song about a breakup and the guy is getting over it. Basically, this is the guy's version of that obnoxious "So what? I'm still a rock star" song that still gets played on the radio every so often.

The irony about songs like this, though, is that despite the singer's claims that "they are over it" and that "they don't care about it anymore," they contradict themselves somewhat and prove that they are indeed NOT completely over it by writing an entire song about it. If you really are moving on, why are you wasting our time singing about it, huh mister angst?


Track 2: "Busy Little Bee"

Bahahahaha!! Alright, if the lyrics in this song were made to be intentionally bad, then kudos to you, All-American REJECTS, because you just made my day.

"You're a pretty little flower, and I'm a busy little bee."

I honestly can't tell what I'm supposed to take from that, fellas. I mean, at first I thought it was supposed to be some kind of innuendo-based metaphor, but then I remembered that the metaphor for sex isn't "the flowers and the bees," but it's "the birds and the bees."

That aside, the rest of the song seems to indicate the guy in the song is just pallin' around with this "pretty little flower" of a girl, so why exactly does he refer to himself as a "busy little bee?"

Well let's think about this for a moment: Bees are known to land on flowers in order to collect nectar from them, which usually gets some pollen on their little bee bodies, which they then carry over to other flowers, and areas, which helps cross-pollinate and whatnot.

Perhaps then, what this guy means to say when he sings "I'm a busy little bee," is something along the lines of:

"I am taking things about you and spreading them to other women."

Oh, I get it! It's about gossiping, right?

To wrap things up here, I'm just going to go ahead and give these two songs a score so we can all get on with our lives.

"Kids in the Street" gets 2 gossiping-busy-bees out of 5.

By Jaren Jolley

Scoring for The Hunger Games features pieces by Arcade Fire, The Decemberists, Taylor Swift, and The Civil Wars. 

Arcade Fire singer Win Butler talks about the music for the film:

"Our whole approach was to get into the world and try to create something that serves the story and the film. There's something in the story of Abraham and Isaac that I think resonates with the themes in the film, like sacrificing children. So we made a weird, alternate-universe version of that, where it's as if Abraham had a daughter — kind of a metaphor for [Hunger Games character] Katniss."

The song Abraham's Daughter by Arcade Fire is featured below.

By Nick Lives

People don’t pay much attention to lyrics in songs, do they? Most of the time the reason someone likes a song has more to do with the melody or beat than the message the song seems to be sending. After all, I’m sure most teens don’t play poker or are even aware of what a “poker face” is, but that doesn’t stop them from singing along with Lady Gaga, a woman who I’m also certain does not play any poker.

That’s why people like me exist.

LFMAO’s Party Rock Anthem is by far one of the most overplayed songs at dance parties. Whether this has to do with the fact that it has the word “party” in its title is anyone’s guess. Regardless, a song as popular as “Party Rock” is bound to have an effect on its audience.

 Whether you love the lyrics, hate them, or simply don’t pay attention to them, it’s a well-known fact that all song lyrics are full of subliminal messaging. Subliminal messages, messages that are hidden within the text, designed to brainwash you, your family, and everyone you care about. So if I don’t overanalyze the lyrics for the good of mankind, who will?

I decided to investigate further by looking up the lyrics to the popular song.

To help illustrate my findings, I have highlighted all suspicious or subliminal messages in red. What you are about to see may disturb you:

 
Party rock is in the house tonight

Everybody just have a good time

And we gonna make you lose your mind

Everybody just have a good time


Translation: The writers of the song seem to be telling us rather bluntly that their song is indeed evil, and will indeed cause you to “lose your mind.” How did no one spot this before?


Party rock is in the house tonight

Everybody just have a good time

And we gonna make you lose your mind

We just wanna see ya shake that

 

In the club party rock, lookin' for you r girl? She on my jock

Nonstop when we in the spot, booty movin' weight like she on the block

Where the drank? I gots to know, tight jeans, tattoo 'cause I'm rock 'n' roll

Half black, half white, domino, game the money, op-a-doe


Translation: Now things are getting more sinister. After having admitted that this song will most certainly brainwash you beyond comprehension, the song now tells us that they will hunt us down “nonstop” if the brainwashing doesn’t work the first time.

 

Yo, I'm runnin' through these ho's like Drano

I got that devilish flow, rock 'n' roll, no halo

We party rock, yeah, that's the crew that I'm reppin'

On the rise to the top, no lead in our zeppelin, hey


Translation: The “we” often pops up whenever “party rock” is mentioned, leading me to believe this isn’t just one or two evil dudes, but an entire CULT that goes by the unified name of “Party Rock.” Here it is also revealed that the Party Rock cult runs through “devilish flows,” which seems to indicate some form of devil worship is going on here. What concerns me most though, is that the line “on the rise” seems to indicate that the cult has even bigger plans on the horizon. Could we be talking about world domination here?

 
Party rock is in the house tonight

Everybody just have a good time

And we gonna make you lose your mind

Everybody just have a good time

 

Party rock is in the house tonight

Everybody just have a good time

And we gonna make you lose your mind

We just wanna see ya shake that

 

Everyday I'm shufflin'

Shufflin', shufflin'


Translation: This is a rather fitting verb for a cult, actually. With those long robes they always have on, I imagine a person really would be forced to “shuffle” in place of “walking.” This seems to be the Party Rock cult’s signature phrase.


Step up fast and be the first girl to make me throw this cash

We gettin' money, don't be mad now, stop, hatin' is bad


Translation: Now that we’ve changed back to the singular “me” instead of the “we” for this phrase, I believe it’s safe to assume that this is a message sent directly from the cult leader, whose name we will now assume to be “Ferrin Grobble.” The message here seems to indicate that Ferrin strongly dislikes fast moving people. Hmm, I wonder if that has any connection to the “shuffling” aspect?


One more shot for us, another round

Please fill up my cup, don't mess around

We just wanna see you shake it now

Now you wanna be, you're naked now


Translation: Don’t shake huh? Well once again we have a line indicating a hatred for fast or sudden movements. Why such hatred for fast moving things? Perhaps the leader of the Party Rock cult is… a Gopher of some sort?


Get up, get down, put your hands up to the sound

Get up, get down, put your hands up to the sound

Get up, get down, put your hands up to the sound

Put your hands up to the sound, put your hands up to the sound
 
Get up, get up, get up, get up

Get up, get up, get up, get up

Get up, put your hands up to the sound, to the sound

Put your hands up, put your hands up, put your hands up, put your hands up


Translation: Is G. G. G. a possible acronym for Giant Green Gophers? That would relate to my earlier theory after all. Is it possible that this song was written as propaganda for a cult made up of giant green gopher people?


Party rock is in the house tonight

(Put your hands up)

Everybody just have a good time

(Put your hands up)

And we gonna make you lose your mind

(Put your hands up)

Everybody just have a good, good, good time
 
Put your hands up

Put your hands up

Put your hands up

Shake that, everyday I'm shufflin'


It’s abundantly clear to me that this “Party Rock” is most definitely not simply a song about partying and/or rocking. Indeed I believe the “Anthem” part is the most accurate part of the title, considering that the lyrics seem to reveal that this is indeed an “anthem” for the  Devil-Worshipping Underground Cult of Giant Green Gopher people. Go figure.